Why is purpose so elusive?
“What do you want to be when you grow up?”
Do you remember being asked that question when you were a kid? Do you remember how hard it was to answer? Often when we’re at school there is a big focus on what you want to be when you grow up as it informs the decisions you make about finishing school - whether it’s to go to university, get a trade, to travel and so on. Maybe you were one of the kids clear from the start what you wanted to ‘be’ but as you’ve gotten older that focus and drive has drifted.
We put so much pressure on ourselves to decide what we want to do with our lives, when in actual fact that ‘what’ can change with each new milestone in life. Finding your partner, having children, moving, any life change can impact the ‘what’ we want to do with our lives.
So what is purpose? Your purpose is your motivation, the reasons you get up in the morning. Your purpose can guide the decisions you make, influence your behaviour and create meaning in your life. For some people it’s their ‘work’. For others it’s the responsibilities we have to family or friends. Others may find purpose in religion or spirituality.
Your purpose is unique to you. What you identify with as your path, may be very different from others. What’s important to understand is that your purpose can shift and change throughout life. It doesn’t have to be one thing… forever.
Which is why purpose feels elusive for so many women. We try to answer the ‘rest of my life’ question, rather than focusing on what is right for me, right now, in this moment of my life.
We will all go through moments where we are unsure, perhaps even drifting a little. Do you find yourself asking, so what do I do now? Then you are probably in the process of redefining your purpose.
I experienced this when we moved overseas. Initially it was easy for me to continue my HR career, but with each move it got more difficult and when we moved to Chongqing and subsequently Taipei, my professional career was out of reach. I felt lost. I felt frustrated. I felt alone.
Then I read Lucille's amazing blog “Expitterpattica” and the post was about why as an expat you have the skills to start your own business, and a light bulb went off. This was the start of my journey and subsequently The Leap To Lead. I’m not suggesting that everyone needs to start their own business, but for me in my life situation, it was the perfect solution. If you want to learn more about starting and running your own business, check out Amel at Tandem Nomdads.
What I want you to take away from my experience is that feeling lost is a normal part of life. Feeling frustrated with your current circumstances is a journey many women experience. But feeling this way doesn’t have to be permanent. You can make a decision now to change it for yourself.
How? By deciding what your next journey looks like. By deciding what you really want. By finding your purpose. How do we find purpose? By understanding your strengths, your interests and passions.
Once you have clarity on these, you can then start to shape it into something you can take action on. The options are endless… learning new skills, retraining, volunteering, being a better mum, returning to work, changing careers and so on.
If you are looking for what’s next, start by asking yourself what are my strengths? How do I want to use these in my life? How do I want my strengths to show up for me?
I have a free strengths assessment that might help you with this, you can download this now ‘What Am I Good At?’ - https://www.theleaptolead.com/guide
Now that you have clarity of your strengths, and you know how you want to use them, this is when you create an action plan for yourself. What do you need to do today, tomorrow, next week to make this a reality for yourself. Put it in your diary and make time for it. Make time for yourself, your most important project!
If this sounds like something you would like to explore further privately in a one on one conversation, I invite you to book a call with me. Let’s connect and talk about your situation and how you can change it. This is a FREE call, there is no obligation, simply allow me the opportunity to support you.
Book your call here - https://calendly.com/theleaptolead/coaching
Purpose doesn’t have to be elusive. You can start now to find yours.
